The Hilarious Downfall of B2B SaaS Messaging: A Tragicomedy

Gedi
3 min readMar 25, 2024

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A delightful embarking romp through the whimsical world of B2B SaaS companies, where messaging blunders are more common than a hipster in a coffee shop. Who knew that the arcane realm of software-as-a-service could be fraught with such comedic potential?

Act 1: The Art of Talking to Everyone and Reaching No One

Imagine trying to serenade everyone at a party and ending up alone with a microwave burrito at 2 AM. That’s essentially what happens when B2B SaaS companies try to woo every conceivable audience with their messaging. “Dear CEOs, interns, and that guy from accounting who still uses a flip phone, our software is just for you!” It’s like trying to perform Hamlet at a rave; the message just gets lost in the noise.

Act 2: Courting the Corporate Royalty

Next up, we have the classic faux pas of wooing the wrong crowd. Many B2B SaaS firms have a crush on executives. Yes, they’re aiming their charm offensive at CEOs, the corporate equivalent of prom kings and queens. But here’s the kicker: these high-flying execs aren’t the ones swiping the corporate card for new software. It’s like trying to sell a fish a bicycle, or even better, selling a bicycle a fish. Either way, it’s not going anywhere.

Act 3: The Revenue Mirage

Now, let’s talk about revenue, the ultimate catnip for businesses. Some SaaS companies shout about revenue potential like it’s a magic spell. “Say revenue thrice, and a CFO shall appear!” But here’s the thing: if your product messaging is all about the money, it’s about as convincing as a three-dollar bill. It’s like telling someone on a first date how rich you think they’ll make you. Spoiler alert: There won’t be a second date.

Act 4: Vision Quest Gone Wrong

Finally, there’s the visionary messaging, where companies are so busy gazing into the future they forget what they’re selling today. It’s like a chef who keeps talking about the meals they’ll cook next year, ignoring the fact that the diners are currently eating their shoes out of hunger. Yes, we get it, the future’s so bright we need shades, but how about focusing on what’s on the plate right now?

Conclusion

In the grand circus of B2B SaaS messaging, these companies often walk a tightrope between genius and folly. But fear not, dear reader, for there’s hope on the horizon. With a pinch of focus, a dash of audience understanding, and a generous helping of present-day relevance, they might just find their way to messaging nirvana.

So, here’s to the SaaS companies, the unsung heroes battling the behemoth of bad messaging. May your visions be clear, your target audience accurate, and your revenue discussions grounded. After all, in the world of B2B SaaS, the right message can be the difference between soaring with eagles or swimming with the ducks.

This satirical piece aims to entertain while shedding light on common pitfalls in B2B SaaS messaging, hopefully providing some chuckles along the way.

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Gedi
Gedi

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